Want to know what it is about girls that turns a boy on-and off? The brothers Cowsill give their opinions.
The subject was GIRLS. And when I mentioned this to Bill and Bob Cowsill they both loved the idea. "We don't want to criticize girls," Bob, the younger of the brothers admitted. "But, there are times when you can't help feeling someone should tell certain girls that there are things they do that really turn a guy off! As well as things that turn a guy on."
Bill and Bob are honest to the bone with their opinions. But they were quick to qualify their opinion because, as they put it, they're not "experts" about girls.
"When we were trying to make ends meet and worked hard for a break, we just didn't have time for many dates," Bill sadly stated. Bob added, "And neither of us has ever gone steady — I think I would break all the rules if I tried — so we're not what you'd call specialists or anything."
Then Bill launched into the subject of what boys like and don't like about girls.
"I'm not what you'd call aggressive when it comes to looking for a girl," Bill said. He looked confident enough to surprise me when he said, "I guess you could say I'm insecure — even afraid! I couldn't walk up to a girl and start in just like that.
"So I look for a response from a girl. It has to be natural, of course," he added, "What really annoys me about girls you sometimes meet is dishonesty. Some girls either try to pretend they know something about everything, or, in the looks department, try to look like a cover girl — older than they are and all faked up.
"I really like girls who are honest. They don't try to put themselves on, or me on. Which," Bill continued, "a guy really appreciates and respects. On the legative side, Bill says, "Name-dropping really turns me off. I could care!"
In fact, anything that would embarrass a guy ranked high on both boys list of negatives for girls.
"Being with a girl who is deadpan really puts me on the spot," Bob chimed in. "That's why I've never gone out on a blind date. I'm afraid! What if we weren't compatible? But really the real drawback for me would be going out with a girl who doesn't say anything all evening. Sure," he added, "I know some girls are nervous, especially on a first date. But doesn't it show an awful lack of consideration for the guy if a girl won't even tell you what she wants to do?
"It puts me on the spot if I have to make all the decisions about the evening without any help from the girl," Bob went on. "When you ask her where she'd like to go, or what she'd like to do, and all you get is a dead-pan, that makes you feel she isn't crazy about doing anything with you!" And this reminded Bill of another thing boys don't like. "If a girl is too proper, too polite even, it puts me off. And I know it does the same thing for lots of my friends. So I prefer loose people. But," he quickly added, "not messy. A girl always looks more attractive when she's neat and clean. She doesn't have to be dressed up, but she shouldn't look like she got dragged around — that really puts me off."
"A sort of casual, natural but neat look has it made to me," Bill stated. "Physical attraction is usually your first reason for getting together," admitted Bill, "But if the girl you're interested in tries too hard, or is silent too much, or especially if she's a show-off, that can kill it right there."
Bob agreed with Bill about the looks of the girls that attract him at first — "A sort of healthy country-girl image — natural, healthy, beauty I guess you'd call it — goes on the plus side with me. But," he continued, "Like they say, beauty is only skin deep. The real beauty is underneath." Bill nodded his agreement. "I know plenty of girls who aren't especially pretty, but they're great to be with."
Bill interrupted to give the opinion of a college student (he's in his sophomore year at a New York college) on the subject. He really gets deep! "Most people," he stated, "are looking to be loved more than to love. That includes guys! So if a guy meets a girl who seems to be more interested in liking him than in having him like her, she's sure to get a response. If a girl tries to share his hopes and ideas, she'll be able to forget about herself more, be less inhibited and straight — honest — with a guy. That's great!" Bill finished triumphantly.
Everyone agreed it was a great way, especially for shy girls. "You see, a lot of people are afraid of emotions. I like to feel emotional with a girl I like,' Bill candidly asserted. "There's nothing wrong with feelings. They're part of being human! If two people can cry together, I think that's beautiful!"
Speaking about honest feelings started Bob off. He recalled, "The last date I had — I mean a formal one — was for the Senior Prom, on June 10th of last year. This was up at Newport, where I went to school. At the time I was really messed up. I thought the whole time was going to be bad, but I had a ball. I can say it was one of the nicest nights I ever spent.
"I'd known my date through high school. I'd dated her a few times, but we weren't steadies or anything. I felt comfortable with her, we talked a lot and I learned a lot from her. (I hope she learned something from me!) But it was a perfect date because we weren't trying to pretend anything. We knew each other."
So, the boys agreed, Bob had brought up what their 'perfect' girl would be like. She wouldn't have to be any particular 'type' like blonde or brunette, but she would be warm, unselfish, have a sense of humor and be able to think about others and make a boy feel comfortable and confident. She exists in every girl ...
By DANA OHLMEYER